


a dying breed, a certain kind

by cactusboob



Category: Ferris Bueller's Day Off (1986)
Genre: Dom/sub Undertones, Friendship, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Light Angst, Love, M/M, Non-Linear Narrative, Obsession, Requited Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-08
Updated: 2020-11-08
Packaged: 2021-03-08 21:35:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 690
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27443503
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cactusboob/pseuds/cactusboob
Summary: in which cameron pines (poetically, of course) and ferris is ferris (which could be a good thing, but could also be a very bad thing)featuring my inability to write coherently
Relationships: Ferris Bueller/Cameron Frye
Comments: 6
Kudos: 21





	a dying breed, a certain kind

**Author's Note:**

> hi, so, um this one might not flow so well cause i tried to write to where cameron's name is said/read as little as possible, so ferris' would be noticed more, because i kinda wanted to portray an obsession on cameron's part, in a sense
> 
> (can you tell that i took some inspiration from rebecca?)

one can never really get to know ferris bueller- he is an enigma, a labyrinthine unfathomable  _ maniac _ , and all he wants to do, wants to know is  _ how _ and  _ what  _ and for fucks sake,  _ why _ . but he can't. because one can never really get to know ferris bueller, the one larger than life.

———

_ so, _ he thinks, just before he hits asphalt,  _ this is how it's gonna be, huh? _ and, then, he makes contact with asphalt- face first. it hurts, hurts like a bitch. and, yet,  _ yet _ , he gets back up again. climbs those stairs. falls again. 

all because of–

———

ferris rolls his eyes, says,"if you don't do this with me, i'm gonna have a new friend by thursday." it's wednesday, you won't have enough time, dummy he doesn't say. because, yeah, ferris is so cool, so astonishing, that he could make new friends in  _ seconds _ . 

he could be friends with the coolest person in the whole of the fifth grade–maybe even the  _ sixth  _ grade- and he stays with cameron.  _ why me, _ he wants to ask,  _ why not you,  _ ferris would respond. 

———

ferris bueller has that hollywood life, the perfect life. two working parents, an annoying older sister, a big, damn near mansion like house, the snark and sarcasm, the dorky friend.

he knows this. knows that this makes ferris naive, makes it to where he just can't comprehend why a bully decides to, well,  _ bully _ .

———

he's drowning, dying, ending. ceasing to be in a hot tub with ferris bueller and his girlfriend.  _ of course,  _ he thinks, head cloudy,  _ of course even my death has 'ferris bueller waz here' written all over it _ .

and, then, he is out of the water, no longer drowning. ferris has him by the arms, sloane looks terrified, and, and-

"ferris bueller, you're my hero." 

but is he, really? is he the batman to cameron's scared, hapless civilian? or the joker? is he saving, or ruining?

the world may never know.

———

ferris bueller makes him (irrationally) angry, makes him feel like he's thirteen again, about to kiss casey everett and feeling terribly nervous, makes him think far too hard and, paradoxically, far too little.

———

his mouth is dry, ferris is too close, his palms are sweaty, ferris smile nice- like the way the sun feels after a long, cold, drab and grey monday morning spent in an excruciatingly depressing cubicle. ferris bueller smells like much, much needed sunshine, and he can't quite breath.

ferris moves closer still. on the televison uncle jesse yelps 'have mercy!' and,  _ christ, ferris is even fucking closer! _

what are you doing, cameron wants to ask. he doesn't. just sits there, hopes for whatever this is to pass. it doesn't. ferris is but inches from his face. he says," i'm gonna try something, ok, cam?"

but cameron doesn't get to answer, because there are lips on his, and god,  _ why are you so good at this _ , and the ever constant, niggling thought of 'this isn't right', and-

they don't talk about it, the next day, the next week, the next month.

———

"that booker kid put you up to this, didn't he," his dad asks, enraged. cameron stares at him, rather bewildered by the fact that ferris, to his father, is so inconsequential, so superfluous, that he can't even be bothered to remember his name.

cameron wants to ask  _ what is your secret? how do you keep  _ ferris _ so far? _ but he doesn't. of course he doesn't. he says, instead," bueller, sir, not booker," and  _ that _ really wasn't the right thing to say. 

he has to slip into his mother's bathroom before school, the next two weeks, to hide the bruise.

———

he can never get to know, can never get to understand what makes ferris  _ ferris _ , and that makes him feel tremendously, immensely  _ pathetic.  _

everything, everything, everything in his life has to do with ferris bueller, and he doesn't even know why ferris prefers sixteen candles over the breakfast club, (why ferris kisses him, when the world is sleeping soundly, when there's so much else he could be doing), why ferris wants to be his friend. 

he doesn't, does not, know.


End file.
